Posts tagged quotes
- Toki: Whoo-wee, I am such one tired guy. How come shopping's so stupid? Whats I have now? All this stuff. What I do?
- Skwisgaar: Yeah, you know what, just throw everything away. That's what I do.
- Toki: Now I t'rows it away.
- Skwisgaar: Just going to die anyway.
- Toki: Guess it's full circle.
- Toki: Here's a bucket a of hank burgers, big gulps and crap you fat tits!!
- Skwisgaar: Try not to choke you fat tub of shit. We loves you :3
- Pickles: Are you aware of the fate of our last restaurant helicopter chef?
- Jean-Pierre: His face was...
- William Murderface: His face was SMASHED!
- Jean-Pierre: Yes I know.
- Toki Wartooth: He slips his hand and face, sluk hoevercrofe.
- Skwisgaar Skwigelf: Hol... holvercraft.
- Toki Wartooth: Coft.
- Skwisgaar Skwigelf: Honoo...
- Pickles: Hovercraft.
- Toki Wartooth: Hoovman.
- Pickles: Hovercraft!
- Skwisgaar Skwigelf: Hloo...
- Toki Wartooth: Hooo...
- Pickles: He's trying to tell you that the chef got his face smashed into uh, the hovercraft, that's what they're trying to tell you.
62 notes (via dikiswevalo)
- Ofdensen: "That little sick girl is here to see you."
- Toki: "Tell her to go die!"
- Ofdensen: "Well, she is dying."
- Toki: ...
- Toki: "goood."
72 notes (via moreorleslie)
“Well, uh. Have fun being fat.”
And people wonder why the band’s manager became the most popular character.
38 notes (via lightningcatters)
Nathan Explosion becomes the Governor of Florida
- Charles: You know, being Governor has its advantages. You'd be quite powerful.
- Nathan: Oh, really? And l could just put all my friends in charge of everything and just rape and pillage the economy and line my pockets with money and go mad with power?
- Charles: You actually could do that, you know - technically.
- William: l want to be in charge of the National Guard.
- Nathan: Alright, you got it.
- Toki: l wants to help people!
- Nathan: You got it!
- William: l need a secretary!
- Nathan: You got it!
- Pickles: l want to be ambassador to China.
- Nathan: You got it.
- Skwisgaar: l wants no part of this decomcrats governments!
- Pickles: Dude, Skwisgaar, do you know that Florida has the highest population of old ladies and old-lady homes?
- William: You could be in charge of old - you know what.
- Skwisgaar: Then l wills be in charge of that - thems old ladies!
- Nathan: You got it!
29 notes (via astralaether)
Driving a car can be fun, but sometimes it’s dangerous. Drinking and driving seems like a fun way to pass the time, maybe it isn’t such a good idea.
If the good Lord wanted us to drink and drive, we would’ve been born with smashed faces.
Private Joe’s going to have to spread your guts to the side of the road. That’s okay, blood makes the grass grow.
Say, you wouldn’t happen to have an extra-big spatula, would you? Billy’s got some eggs. Eggs that are his intestines.
Where’s Glenda? Late again? She’d better drive extra fast. Oh no, her tits are on Oakdale Street and her brains are on Willow Drive. That’s two block away. Long way for tits to be away from brains.
He’s still clutching the steering wheel…with his face! Eyeballs, anyone? Wonder what he was thinking? Well, look at his brains, maybe that’ll tell you.
54 notes (via spicyyeti & early-lavender)
Tributeklok
- Nathan: You're in a tribute band paying tribute to yourself? That's like jacking off to a picture of yourself online!
- Murderface: Which I've done.
- Toki: Of course I'm nots paying tributes to myself. In Thunderhorse, I'm Skwisgaar.
- Skwisgaar: Dat's why my pants and shirts keeps disappearing! Dat's fucking weird dudes.
- Toki: Well we're really good, we plays every Thursday nights.
- [pause]
- Murderface: Wait a minute...
- Nathan: Thursday night? That's impossible, you have astronaut class on Thursday night.
- Murderface: Astronaut class is a lie?! I've been telling everyone that you're gonna be an astronaut! Now you're making me look like an asshole!
115 notes (via pamelahoward)
- Skwisgaar: Gives to me this waterproof guitar that makes sure can floats.
- Toki: And gives me waterproof guitars what shoots out bugs repellsgents.
- Skwisgaar: Gives to me magic gloves whats can makes my hands fly.
- Toki: Oh, gives to me opposites werewolves that turns to humans whens the moons comes outs.
- Skwisgaar: Gives to me the swords that glows, which shows me which way that is north.
- Toki: Oh and gives to me battleaxe what shows which way's south!
- Skwisgaar: Stops copys me.
- Toki: You stops copys me.
- Skwisgaar & Toki: [at the same time in constant rhythm, sometimes getting faster] Stops copys me! Stops copys me! Stops copys me! [repeats]
132 notes (via die-for-dethklok & carbon-made)
